I thought I’d have a bash at a story
it's called The Furious Four.....can't think of a better title
Gopher, Travis, Lubegod, and Khaz As The Furious Four
Angel As The Damsel In Distress
Clipper As The Uber Villain
BobaFett, JackG2, Thescaryhobo, and Myers As Henchmen
Plus Special Guest And Requested Appearances From:
Film People I choose to put in
And Kirsten Dunst
Gopher and Travis are sat at Furious Headquarters round a computer...
Travis: try searching for "Kirsten Dunst naked"
Gopher: I’ve tried that already plus about 50 other variations of that
Khaz and Lube enter from the bathroom...
Gopher: why you looking so shiny lube?
Lube and Khaz look at each other...
All of a sudden the alarm bell goes off...
Khaz: saved by the bell there, Lube!
The Furious Four answer the alarm call...
WildWayz Voice comes through the radio
WildWayz: right then boys listen up, on the screen now you should be seeing clipper, he is a very dangerous man...
Travis: no I see a picture of what appears to be a chocolate desert
Khaz: yeah I see that too
Wildwayz: ok what you see now
Gopher: some sort of wooden Cabin
WildWayz: thats interesting, I interpreted them as a Moose, and a Shack
Lube: he's pimping his bloody site again
WildWayz: anyway down to business, on the screen now is Clipper, we have been after him for years but he has always evaded our capture by boring us with ridiculously long rants that put us to sleep.
Travis: what’s he done this time?
WildWayz: he has kidnapped the daughter of Mr. Smith, the author of “How To Type Badly For Dummies”
Lube: and what’s her name
WildWayz: she goes by the name of Angel
Gopher: ahhhh that explains a few things then
WildWayz: your mission should you choose…
Khaz: hold it there mister….
Khaz: sorry but I forbid you too use that line…it’s far too overused
Khaz Stares at the radio speaker
WildWayz: you looking at me?
Travis throws wild fit screaming something about Taxi Driver
Lube: quick get him tied down
Gopher: how many times do we have to tell you WildWayz…. never say anything scorsese related in front of him
WildWayz: sorry I forgot!
Khaz injects Travis with the “Anti-Scorsese Fit Throwing Drug” the furious four have developed
Khaz: right give him 20 minutes and you can say whatever you want to him
Wildwayz: so anyway…
Lube: basically you want us to rescue Angel, Kill Clipper and save the world?
WildWayz: basically, yeah
Gopher: you’d think we’d get bored of saving the world…. I say we continue in our quest to find a picture of Kirsten Dunst naked
Travis: that gets my vote
Khaz: we can do that later, plus sky is showing The Virgin Suicides later so if we are quick we can be back in time for that.
Lube: what are we waiting for then, lets go.
They get Trav and set off to the Furious Four Van
Lube: we need to find out where to find Clipper
Gopher: swing by the jailhouse I have an idea
MEANWHILE at Clippers secret hideaway…
BobaFett: where should we put the girl Sir?
Clipper: tie her up with the rest of the prisoners
BobaFett: we can’t sir, she’s so small she don’t reach the bar on the wall
Clipper: and I thought she was annoying enough when she was just a Glaswegian
We Return To The Super heroes in The Van, Trav is chanting
Travis: 3 S's - ONE C- 2 E's AN R AND AN O 3 S's - ONE C- 2 E's AN R AND AN O
Gopher: when are those side effects gonna wear off?
Khaz: any minute now he should be fine
Lube: so why are we going to the prison?
Gopher: to see Paul Verhoven
Lube: and that’s because?
Gopher: he may be able to help us
Khaz: why is he in prison?
Trav: you mean you never saw Showgirls?
Khaz: someone is back to normal I see
Gopher: so we can say anything in front of him now?
Lube: should be able to
Khaz: hey Trav, You looking at me?
Trav: nah I was just looking out the window
Gopher: that’s wicked
The Four Arrive At The Prison
They approach the front desk, and are greeted by two prison guards, Potzy And PyscoFalcon
Potzy: can I help you?
Khaz: yeah we would like to see Paul Verhoven Please
PyscoFalcon: oi Potzy you said I could say can I help you to the next person
Potzy: yeah well you were too slow
PyscoFalcon: apologies to me at once
Potzy: no you tart
PyscoFalcon: right that’s it!!
PyscoFalcon takes out her handbag and thwaps Potzy to death with it.
PyscoFalcon: can I help you?
Khaz: Like I said we would like to see Paul Verhoven Please
PyscoFalcon: ok you’ll just have to sign this form and then you can go straight through
They sit in the small room, Paul Verhoven Enters
Paul: who the hell are you, The Famous Five?
Travis: who the hell are you? Obviously not Carol Vorderman!
Gopher: ignore him he’s in his post bitchy mode
Khaz: we want to ask you a few questions about clipper
Paul: ahhhh the legendary waffler
Lube: where can we find him?
Paul: the word on the street is he owns a church on the other side of town
Khaz: a church?
Paul: yeah it’s so he can worship Kubrick
Lube: Kubrick? The guy with the cube?
Gopher: what cube?
Lube: you know the cube with the colored sides, he also had a clock thing
Gopher: that’s Rubik you dick head
They set off for the church…
To be continued